Waffle or Spaghetti: How Defining Your Workstyle Doesn’t Really Matter


I planned to write a really thorough blog post for you, and guess what? My week didn’t go as planned, and I am stream-of-consciousness writing this as my husband reviews a grant request I wrote while holding our 7 month old who is wearing only a diaper. Soon, we will take our family of five out for a quick and hopefully healthy dinner before we visit my parents, then attend a free outdoor concert. Life is fun!

So here’s what I had planned to write. I wanted to tell you about the two most common types of work styles I’ve noticed among my friends and family – Waffle and Spaghetti. Do you see where I’m going with this? Yeah, you do. Anyhoo, I always thought of myself as 99% Waffle. You know, I keep my work life and home life separate. I keep specific syrup squares for self-care and exercise. I do not let the syrup for any of my squares seep into strange territory. On the flip side, you have the Spaghetti monster (yes, I said it, monster!) Spaghetti monsters are happy to let all the different aspects of their life overlap, getting work sauce on home sauce on social sauce. And they friggin love it! Or at least they can handle it.

In the past, I’ve been adamantly anti-Spaghetti and very pro-Waffle (there’s an amazing joke in there, btw). When I was working from home, I couldn’t let myself be distracted by a request for cereal, let alone put off completing a task so that I could enjoy a family moment. Nope, lock me in the bedroom and call me Kathy Bates, I needed everything to have a definitive beginning and end. My husband is a different story.

My husband has this magical ability to skip from grading papers (he’s a history professor….a HOT one!) to kicking around the soccer ball with our middle kid, to cleaning up whatever disgusting present one of our fur-babies has left on the floor for us to find by surprise. He doesn’t ever say something like, “I have GOT to get back to writing that piece!” or “I just need some time to wrap up some emails” or other lame commentary.

The Bobs are definitely Waffles
He just goes with the flow, and gets everything finished, and I’ve never understood it! Is he a warlock? How does he get everything DONE?!

Well, I’m here to tell you that after a few weeks of doing regular writing, and (finally!) creating my website, and networking with other AMAZING work-from-home moms, I’ve become a Spaghetti monster. I just can’t Waffle anymore! Not only is it unrealistic for us right now (it’s summer, everyone is home, and we genuinely want to spend time together), it’s also not as effective as I once thought. Truly, I can get just as much accomplished by going with the flow because THE FLOW has ups and downs that allow for creative time, and mommy time, and cleaning time, and self-care time. You know, all the times.

That being said, once everyone goes back to school and work, and we get the littlest Lejman into some part-time preschool, I might go back to being more Waffly. Who’s to say? And if you find that you’re more Waffle or more Spaghetti, and what you’re doing is working for you, great! But if it’s leaving you feeling uptight and stressed out, you might give some thought to trying a different approach. It’s possible that you’re trying to be all Spaghetti about life, when you have a little Waffle inside of you screaming for blocks of syrup, all lined up in neat little rows. Or, you could a buttoned up, whole wheat, organic blueberry Waffle that really just wants to get loose and squirmy and all covered in tomatoes. I’m not here to judge.

I’m here to tell you there is no secret or magical formula for success. You get to define what success looks like to you, and you get to rock your true, authentic self. And seriously, either way – CARBS!!!  Carbs are delicious and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Until next time…



P.S. My only regret is that I couldn’t work in a chicken and waffles joke on this one and that’s a shame. Shoot me an email if you’re up for the task!

1 thought on “Waffle or Spaghetti: How Defining Your Workstyle Doesn’t Really Matter

  1. This is SO accurate! I am a waffle, the husband is spaghetti, and this summer, I have been learning to sauce myself all up in some spaghetti. It’s really hard! Sometimes it feels like being a waffle is the only way to get things done. I have had to embrace the beauty of freelancing and convince myself that not sticking to a schedule is OKAY.

    Wonderful post!

    Liked by 1 person

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